Tag Archives: long awkward pause

babyfeature January 24

The Saturday Six: Awkward Baby Photos

   Those precious baby years of development and wonder only happen once. Think about those baby wide sparkly eyes, the cute little high pitched laughter, the pudgy baby feets, the acceptable double baby chins… Awwww! Remember to capture these moments while you can, because one day those cute, little marshmallow sponges of curiosity will turn into […]

thirftstorefet January 17

The Saturday Six: Enhanced Thrift Store Paintings

  *singing* I’m going to pop some tags…got twenty dollars in my pocket…got kicked out of the thrift store for singing this song too much…my hair kinda makes me look like Roger from Doug…*done singing* David Irvine is an artist on a mission to save bad paintings from their own wooded country road drippy selves. He is a […]

bedfeature January 10

The Saturday Six: Pretty Amazing Beds

   Doesn’t matter how rich or how poor you are… The bed is the one piece of furniture that makes your house a home… It’s the one thing you look forward too at the end of a long day… It’s the one thing you don’t want to get out of on a cold day… It […]

fliesfeature January 03

The Saturday Six: Making Hilarious Art with Dead Flies

  Swedish photographer Magnus Muhr was really bored one day…and also his house was infested with flies. So… You know how the saying goes…when life hands you dead flies, make dead fly art. Just like Muhr and his dead fly art, we have put together some dead fly art of our own,,,in the form of a poem. About […]

elderyfeature December 27

The Saturday Six: When You Don’t Care Anymore

  Some people fear getting old. And some people can’t wait. There are some nice benefits to it: discounts, retirement, early dinners, electric scooters, jello, being an extra on those Lifeline Medical Alert commercials, and most importantly, being able to say whatever-the-hell you want, when you want. “Can you believe Bob just said that about […]

lightsfeature December 20

The Saturday Six: Stringing Up The Lights

  Katie was in charge of decorating the office for Christmas this year. She did a really good job. Below are a few of the cubicles she gave the spirit of the Holidays too. Feel free to visit the offices if you would like to see the rest of the staff’s decorations. This is how […]

christmassweaterfeatue December 13

The Saturday Six: Ridiculously Ugly Christmas Sweaters

   Over the last 10 years or so a couple of new Christmas traditions have come to surface. One being that damn Elf on the Shelf… The second being bad Christmas Sweaters. Don’t get us wrong…bad Christmas Sweaters have been around since Mary knitted Joseph the first one right before Christmas number two was celebrated…but […]

meh-coffee-mug December 06

The Saturday Six: Coffee Mugs that Should be on your Christmas List

   The best tasting, as well as most expensive coffee in the world is actually filtered through the digestive track of a monkey. That’s right… It’s made with monkey poop. We apologize if you just spit your coffee out all over yourself as you read that. We’re laughing, but we apologize. The coffee is called, […]

saturday six button November 22

The Saturday Six: A Few Reasons you Should Play with your Food

  The Food Network has been playing on the office TV a lot this month. BrainRants really likes that channel and well…we try not to mess with him or his TV time too much when he is in a good mood. And he has been in a good mood! So we let him watch his […]

shopping November 20

Male Aversion To Holiday Shopping Linked To Survival Instinct

It’s an American tradition: Kicking off the holiday shopping season by spending the morning after Thanksgiving standing in line at your favorite department store, shivering in the pre-dawn hours, determined to be among the first to get through the doors before your holiday dinner bowel movement hits. It’s a calculated risk, but one we are […]

saturday six button November 15

The Saturday Six: She’s Got Steve Buscemi Eyes

  Even if you think you don’t know who Steve Buscemi is…you know him. He is one of those actors whom you have seen in many different films and when he pops up in the movie, you say, “Oh yeah…that guy! He’s good! And creepy! But still good!” This is Steve Buscemi: He usually plays sleazy, […]

saturday six button November 08

The Saturday Six: Sexy Animal Photoshoots

   Everyone wants to feel sexy. Even your pets. I kind of envy the animal kingdom in the fact that they don’t have to worry about dressing up fancy, buying fancy perfume, putting on fancy makeup, and/or shaving various parts of their fancy body. They just kind of go out, make a noise, and see […]

dogfeatured November 06

Intercultural Misunderstandings in the Dog World

  Welcome today’s Guest Poster: Ellen Hawley. A former New Yorker, now living in the land of Cornwall. That’s in the U.K. in case your geography is super bad. Her blog can be found at  Notes from the U.K. , which talks about such New York to England differences. She is the author of two novels,Open Line […]

saturday six button November 01

The Saturday Six: Weird Toys for Kids?

   The innocence and bill free days of childhood…. If we could only go back for one day… A day filled with Chuck E Cheese and Christmas and Easter and Birthday Parities and late night scary movies on channel 10 with your best friend… But we can’t. Right now, you are actually late for work […]

saturday six button October 25

The Saturday Six: Epic Pumpkin Carving Skills

   This whole month we have been talking about pumpkins. Some of us…hate them. Some of us…mildly tolerate them. One of us is excited for Christmas already. While most of the country is busy bitching about Pumpkin Spice and the other Spice Girls, and carving the traditional square, square, triangle, half moon with teeth into […]

saturday six button October 18

The Saturday Six: It’s Symmetrical, Watson!

   We all have that one friend…that one person…who needs everything just so, just right, everything in it’s place, everything lined up, everything where it should be… And if you can’t think of that one friend or relative who is like that….guess what? It’s you! You can call it a disorder. You can call it […]

ned October 16

SPECIAL REPORT: Ebola virus may spread faster than Brad-Angelina sex tape

To avoid creating widespread panic with that headline, let me begin by assuring everyone there’s NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT! You did not somehow miss a Brad and Angelina sex tape that was leaked onto the Internet. However, before giving a huge sigh of relief, there’s still that whole Ebola thing going on in Texas which, […]

saturday six button October 11

The Saturday Six: Exploring Daily Life Facts

  Do you know what’s funny? The World. Do you know why it’s so gosh darn funny? Because even when you look around you and everything seems to make sense…it doesn’t. Sometimes if you take a moment to peel back the layers, nothing at all makes sense. Take for example: Turtle Neck Sweaters. On the […]

investment October 09

LAP’s Investment Hoarding Guide

If you’re like me, you get deluged with snail-mail, e-mail and telemarketers trying to sell you the latest, hottest and most profitable get-rich-quick scheme. They all share some common traits: One, they’re profitable – for the jerk selling the plan, and; Two, they involve either gold, silver, diamonds or ‘official’ minted coins made of that […]

saturday six button October 04

The Saturday Six: Awesome Group Halloween Costume Ideas

  Halloween will be here faster than you know it. When most of the staffers at Long Awkward Pause were kids, the vinyl costume ruled the streets. This was the one where the mask was plastic and went around your head with an elastic band. While the costume itself, you stepped into like surgical scrubs, […]

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