Tag Archives: boobs

This Week I Learned Pt III

Reddit.com has this great feature called: Today I Learned, which complies little interesting and trivial facts about random things. We here at Long Awkward Pause have gathered a sample of some that we found worthy of mention:   A company is now able to mass produce spider silk. They inserted the genes of the spider into […]

cfeature September 27

The Saturday Six: Coloring Book Corruptions

   As a child, coloring was always a good time waster. It didn’t matter whether or not you colored in the lines, out of the lines, or  like Robin Thicke, and colored with blurred lines. And half naked dancing girls. And Miley Cyrus, with a foam finger. Taking a poll amongst the staffers of Long Awkward […]

notesfeature September 20

The Saturday Six: Passive/Aggressive Notes

   We all have that one friend…that one person…who is soooooo passive/aggressive it just kills you. Like they ooze it. You know whenever you engage this person in conversation, you will immediately end up with a headache. One example of our favorite passive/aggressive things that people do, is when they have a name that is […]

fonze September 18

It’s official: Everyone wants to be cool

A recent poll conducted by the staff here at Long Awkward Pause suggests that a whopping 95 percent of Americans (living within a one-block radius of LAP headquarters) either want to be — or already consider themselves to be — really cool. And not just because of their proximity to our office. I should point […]

inventions September 16

The Greatest Inventions That Don’t Get Enough Credit

Throughout the decades and centuries there has been some inventions that have changed the world….fire, the wheel, the assembly line, the Victoria Secret Bra,and the iPhone….just to name a few. But there are the unsung heroes of the invention world that never get any praise or spotlight, yet we can’t live without them.   The Windshield […]

pizzafeature September 13

The Saturday Six: Pizza! Pizza!

   There are a list of perfect foods in the world. Everyone’s order of the foods would be different, but we think the list would be fairly similar for everyone. One of the foods in the list would definitely be pizza. And how could it not? It’s almost the perfect food. You could make the crust anything […]

mobile-15632-1409343324-30 September 06

The Saturday Six: Awkward Kid Photos

   Ah…. The innocence of youth, and how it’s wasted on the young. Those darling apples of your eyes… Hey…what does that mean anyway? Apples don’t have eyes. Eyes don’t have apples. Oops. Sorry. We digress. Let’s try again. Those darling apples of your eyes…. Listen…seriously…who came up with that? Potatoes have eyes. That would […]

common-core-math-problem September 05

Common Core – The Death Of Math As We Know It (And Not In A Good Way)

“Daddy, I need your help,” the 7 year old says to me. “Sure honey…with what?” I respond. “Homework. Math. I don’t understand it.” Second grade math. Easy. Addition. Subtraction. Piece. Of. Cake. Now is my chance to look like a Super Hero! Captain Mathman! Super Subtraction-man! The Great Additionanator! With great pride and bravado I […]

themoreyouknow September 04

This Week I Learned Pt II

Reddit.com has this great feature called: Today I Learned, which complies little interesting and trivial facts about random things. We here at Long Awkward Pause have gathered a sample of some that we found worthy of mention:   The price of admission for a zoo in 18th century England was a dog or a cat — […]

nailfeature August 30

The Saturday Six: Pop Culture Nails

   Nailed it! That’s right…we told a joke that your Great Uncle Herbert or your Dad might tell. It’s not beneath us. We went for the cheap laughs. We will do it again. Hey! No! We do not  feel like we have had enough to drink yet…nor do we feel like we are ruining Little […]

makeup August 23

The Saturday Six: Fake Celebrity Makeovers

   Who doesn’t want to be beautiful? Except Hairless Cats. Instagram is becoming the place for makeup tips and Cleopatra-like beauty transformations. More than 45 million Instagram posts are currently tagged with the word #makeup and/or #makeuptransformation. And what is more empowering than women helping women spend more money at Ulta?   And sure, we admit #6 looks […]

The Original August 16

The Saturday Six: Help Me Catch The Sun!

  There is not a whole lot to say about this Saturday’s Six except it made the office crack up. (Well it made Chris crack up…for hours…like a loony. So much so we almost called an ambulance. He is actually still laughing…on the floor…rolling around. ) This guy asked the internet for help in Photoshopping […]

robin williams August 13

Long Awkward Pause Celebrates Robin Williams

There is no doubt your Facebook/Twitter feeds are currently full of pictures of Mrs. Doubtfire as well as Aladdin and that hilarious genie sharing a heartfelt hug. No secret as of today, Robin Williams is dead. Social media is mourning, the only way Social media can. That’s by sharing animated gifs, frowny emoticons, and pictures of […]

Tubes or Tubey or Tubies. If one of your friends calls them Penne then they are just being pretentious. August 11

Long Awkward Pause’s Tips On Pasta

Pasta. We all love it. Even if someone says they don’t…they secretly do. It’s too multifaceted not to love. It comes in too many shapes and sizes not to love. There are too many sauce choices to go with it, not to love. You can serve it as a side dish. You can serve it as […]

image August 09

The Saturday Six: Cats Copying Models

   We, at Long Awkward Pause, have been complaining for years now about Cats taking over the internet. We first noticed the cat infiltration happening as early as 1973. You see, cats are smart. They are not just trying to take over the internet in a single day. Oh no! They have slowly and methodically, kilobyte by kilobyte taking […]

baby4 August 02

The Saturday Six: Weird Pregnancy Photos

   From that first time peeing on the pregnancy test stick to the final pushing of life from the nether regions of your spouse/girlfriend/baby momma, pregnancy is a joyous and hard celebration of our continuing existence of the human race. Much like other milestones in life, pregnancy has it’s traditional rituals. There is the  buying the ‘What […]

wtf July 26

The Saturday Six: Provocative Doodles

   David Jablow is a multi-media artist who took some suggestive mid-2oth century “doodle pads” and added his own creative flair to them. Remember kiddies, this is back before internet porn. This is what you call: Do-it-yourself-porn. Hopefully you good at drawing…accessories.     Below is the doodle we picked to feature on this week’s SS6 because of […]

headline July 19

The Saturday Six: WTF Headlines

  Grandfather had a special way to fold his newspaper when he read it. It was quite the origami master fold. It was so he could read the paper easier and then end with the jumble puzzle as a treat for getting through the boring political sections. For those unfamiliar with newspapers, they are long […]

statelaws July 12

The Saturday Six: Weird Driving Laws

  If you haven’t seen the show, House of Cards, it’s about the corruption and intrigue behind the nation’s capital. Did we mention it stars a friend of ours? *Name drop in 5…4…3….* Kevin Spacey! In the show…between killing drunk Congressmen, back stabbing the President, fighting the Chinese, and some good old fashion lesbian sex…you get […]

inappfeature July 05

The Saturday Six: Inappropriate Kid’s Notes

   Oh, kids… They are the light of your life, the pain in your neck, the meaning of your existence, and the drain on your pocket book. So when one of your little offspring comes waddling up to you in their little feety pajamas with the back butt flap half buttoned and hands you a […]

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