Author Archives: Howard Gantz, Manager

Hey, look at the camera.  Look at the camera.  Hey. January 27

Christmas In January?

As I lapped up a bowl of Frosted Flakes, my eyes remaining fixated on the debatably-racist cartoon rooster promenading across the television screen. A bit of anxiety festered about a mandatory shoe-shopping excursion supposedly transpiring later, but, for the most part, this was just a normal, delightfully-lethargic Saturday morning for this six-year-old. With a slap […]

Confessions New November 25

Another Thanksgiving Without a Gravy Trough

Another Thanksgiving is here and once again my mom has put the kibosh on my gravy trough proposal. Six years have passed since I incepted this bolt of brilliance, and for six straight years my mom has refused to become a part of history. It’s all “Oh, it’s not tradition,” and “No, that would be […]

sleeping-beauty-ballet-cr October 26

Vampire Interviews, Top Gun, and Blood Sausage

It was daunting assignment and I had every right to be nervous.  Anyone would be a little scared; most people recognized how reopening a dialogue with a strange, mysterious neighbor after eighteen months of passively cherishing the mutual, silence would be more uncomfortable than fun-comfortable or pun-comfortable. My initial meeting with Devin was brief.  Having […]

pumpkin October 22

Long Awkward Pause Takes On An Interview With A Halloween Celebrity

Howard Gantz, manager here. Halloween is upon us which means candy, little children in adorable costumes and grown women in slutty costumes… Oh, how I love Halloween! Here is an idea…why not dress up as your favorite L.A.P. columnist? You will be the hit of the neighborhood! Trust me! “You are dressed as BrainRants! Here […]

prompt-logo-title October 07

Long Awkward Pause Takes On The Picture Prompt

Howard Gantz, manager here. It’s hard to believe it’s October already! Christmas is less than 90 days away. You are welcome for that thought! We at Long Awkward Pause have a great October planned for you! Speaking of October, be sure to grab your tickets to the L.A.P. Annual Halloween Costume Party. This years event […]

four-interview-chairs-on-stage-kantilal-patel September 30

LAP Update: Tour Stop Canceled in Kalamazoo, Michigan

Howard Gantz, manager here. It is with sad and great regret that I have to announce the Round Table on Oct. 5th in Kalamazoo, Michigan with Long Awkward Pause has been cancelled. If you have pre-purchased your tickets please email me and I will either send you tickets for another event or refund your money. If […]

remakes September 19

Long Awkward Pause Takes On Hollywood Remakes

Hello! Howard Ganz here, manager of Long Awkward Pause, and I’m excited to introduce this week’s topic: Hollywood Remakes! It was sent in to us from Anonymous and reads; “Discuss Hollywood’s penchant for remaking movies or “rebooting” every goddam thing under the sun.” I don’t know where the name Anonymous comes from…maybe it’s Greek? Russian? Slovak? […]

tourbooklap September 17

The L.A.P. Tour Book Is Available!

Howard Gantz, Manager here! The long awaited Long Awkward Pause Official Photo Concert Tour Book For Dummies is on sale for a limited time! Pick up your yours today! There is only a limited number of copies available! Here is a small sampling of what you will find inside: Over 400 pages of photos and […]

Well played, Howard. Well played. September 11

Tickets Still Available!

Howard Gantz, manager here! Just a quick update! There are tickets still available for the end of September and the beginning of October for the L.A.P tour! The November show is sold out, sorry! Hope to see you there! Buy a shirt!

Well played, Howard. Well played. August 31

Long Awkward Pause On Coffee

Hello! Howard Ganz here, manager of Long Awkward Pause, and I’m excited to introduce this week’s topic: Coffee! It was sent in to us from Sandy Osorno and reads; “Hi Christopher, Julie here, just an out coffeeholic and a reader of your website. :) I came across this great infographic about America’s addiction on this […]

3014051-poster-twinkies August 03


Seven days ago I never thought I’d make it. I made it through a week of school. I was meltdown-free for Mandatory Family Game Night. I even made it through church this morning sans incident, despite sitting next to an old woman whose hand was more scab than skin. No idea how I did it. […]


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